Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Wanted: Positive, Healing Energy

I have been feeling incredibly drained, on edge, exhausted, and unhappy most of the time lately. Some of it is my medication--I think it needs to be adjusted/changed. But, most of it is this house. It is filled with clutter and bad energy. I do not feel relaxed being here; I don't feel at home in 90% of the dwelling. That is not good for me, my family, or the house. The house doesn't deserve to be treated the way we (I) are treating it.

I am rededicating myself to making my house a home. I need to rid it of the negative energy, and fill it with positive energy, love, light, happiness, and comfort.

As a start and as a continuation of the seven things project, I mailed 5 boxes today: 4 were full of teaching material that I am no longer using and the remaining one contained my friend's wedding ring pillow (just in time for her 6 month anniversary). I also began the process of clearning out the garage, starting with the 20 cans of old, unusable paints we have in there. I have disposed of 6, and hope to get to at least 10 before bed.

I have to remind myself that everything makes a difference, even if I can't see it right away. The 4 boxes mailed to NOLA were stored in 2 boxes and a storage crate in the basement. I have gained space down there whether I notice it or not. A tree still makes noise when it falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it. So does clearing out make more room even if no one can tell.

I have to work on being in the moment with my tasks. I felt it with the boxes, but now that I am working on the paints, I have this voice telling me to stop and move on to more pressing matters--school, preschool.

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