Tuesday, November 13, 2007

discomfort

Why is discomfort such a central component of change? Is pain always a stop on the road to a new life?

How much discomfort am I willing to accept on my journey? How much am I willing to put my family through?

Discomfort and I have always had a bad relationship. I was never allowed, in so much as I could be protected, to experience it. As an adult, I have run away many, many times when it came knocking on my door. Even when it was the only thing between me and my dreams/goals/plans. I rationalized it by changing my dreams/goals/plans, but since they keep recurring in different forms, they are still there but I am not yet ready to confront and embrace the discomfort on my way to achieving them.

One crystal clear example of this is my attempts at weight loss. I am unwilling to begin a diet because of the discomfort I might experience as my mind and body adjust to the changes. As much as I want the end result, I am not willing to crawl through the muck to get there.

I want to get to where discomfort and I have a healthy relationship with respect, give and take, and acceptance. I want to be able to acknowledge and accept my feelings of discomfort but not let them deter me from the path I am choosing. I want to be able to simply say "This is hard" and move forward.

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